105 Real Transformation in Midlife: What No One Tells You

We hear a lot about midlife transformation; reinvention, breakthroughs, new beginnings.
 But what no one tells you is that the real transformation often happens quietly, between the breaths.

In this week’s episode of Rooted in Presence, Carly shares her personal story of burnout, perimenopause, and rediscovering her grounding through breathwork.

 It wasn’t a dramatic moment that changed her life, it was what came after.
Integration. Gentle awareness. Everyday presence.

✨ In this episode:

• How midlife can unravel old patterns and reveal what’s true
• The surprising link between breath, grounding, and emotional stability
• How to create sustainable change that supports your nervous system

🎧 Tune in and find out what real transformation in midlife feels like, soft, steady, and wonderfully human.

To explore more support book a free clarity call at carlykillen.com.

Thanks for listening to Rooted In Presence

If you’d like to get in touch with a question about today’s episode or find out how I can support you with coaching, here’s how to reach me:
📧 Email: carlykillenpt@gmail.com
📱 Instagram: @thestrongbonescoach

Do you crave unshakable confidence in your strength from midlife and beyond? Would you love to achieve your goals without sacrificing family time or self-care?

Ready to take your strength to the next level? Start building a stronger body and healthier bones with my Strong Bones Starter Kit—your step-by-step guide to safe and effective strength training at home.
👉 Click here to learn more and access today

🌟 Stay connected and inspired with daily wellness tips on Instagram @thestrongbonescoach.
🌟 For tailored advice or personal queries, email me at carlykillenpt@gmail.com

Thank you for being here, and I look forward to supporting you on your journey to strength, health, and confidence! 💪🦴✨

Transcript

Carly: 0:46

Hello and welcome to Rooted In Presence. I'm your host, Carly Killen, and today I want to talk to you about something that's become a bit of a thread throughout my life, and that's gentle transformation. The real magic that happens when we live, what we learn. And I am sharing this as I celebrate the completion of my 400 hour breathwork facilitator certification. And just recently that's given me space to reflect on this a little more deeply and perhaps try to share with you my thoughts. And of course, as always, I would love to hear yours too. When we think about transformation, when we love the idea, don't we, those big before and after moments, especially as someone who has moved through NHS Health, and now as a coach, I feel like I have a foot in both camps in the wellness world and the fitness world, which is very much led by before and after photos. But it's also in those light bulb flashes, the breakthroughs, the I'll never be the same again, kind of stories. And yeah, these have their place, and I love these moments too. I love the bigness of it all at times, and I've had plenty of them throughout my breath work journeys. I've had bigger emotional releases. I've really felt the energy moving through my body. There's been tears, there's been laughter. There's been deep connection in a room full of open hearts, and that is something that I love about my workshops, but it's not always about these big experiences, and that's not the point of the sessions that I run either because I've come to realize that that's really not where transformation actually lives. It starts there sometimes. Not always. It can be a catalyst, but sometimes it's more of a gentle invitation. But the most important thing is that it's not where it stays. The true transformation is much quieter and it's in what you do after the workshop, how you breathe in the day to day, what you do to support yourself, and what that teaches you about who you are. It is about how you meet yourself when the music stops. So if you'd like to hear more about how you can anchor into a more sustainable form of transformation, keep listening, you're in the right place. So if you're new here, you might not have heard my backstory, and if you're a regular. It is good to have you back, and please bear with, this might sound familiar, but let's go back a few years to the beginning of my own breath journey, and it starts at a time. I was really deep into a burnout and not for the first time, but this time I was experiencing those first signs of perimenopause. My hormones were changing. My energy was all over the place, and even though I was doing what I thought were all the right things, I was still burning out. I was still trying to hold everything at once, my business, my clients, my family, and somewhere in all of that. So I stopped holding myself. And then one day in the middle of all that chaos, someone invited me to try a short breath work practice. And yes, I rolled my eyes at this. I mean, we already know how to breathe, right? Been doing it all my life, although I've had my struggles being somebody that has had really s severe asthma up until the last seven or eight years, but I did it anyway. I placed my hand on my heart. I took a deep breath in through my nose and slowly exhaled through my mouth just as they guided me too. And for the first time in what felt like months and maybe even years, I could actually feel and sense my feet on the floor felt like I was starting to land in my body again. And that one breath, that one moment perhaps was the first time I felt truly grounded in many years. And that started something that has changed everything. And that simple practice started to unfold and become a thread that I started to follow. At first, I used it when I felt more anxious or overwhelmed, a tool to steady myself. Then I started noticing how it filtered into everything. When I was training, I could feel my breath supporting my strength. When I was coaching women through menopause, I began weaving in breath awareness to help them reconnect to their own bodies. And eventually I realized it wasn't just a tool It was also a language, a way of listening to myself and to life. And that's what led me to train as a breathwork facilitator to deepen what had already started changing me from the inside out. And after 400 hours of training and. A lot of living within all of that guiding, being guided, being held by others, learning so much about myself, I can tell you this, the breath doesn't transform you in those big, powerful sessions. It transforms you in those simple everyday moments. Every time you choose to return. So let's talk about where real transformation happens, and that is in the integration because realistically, we don't transform our whole life by lying down on a map for two hours. And yes, those moments are sacred, and I love the energy and connection of my group sessions. It is truly beautiful and I love providing them. But the real work starts when you get up, when you go home, when you meet your breath again the next day with gentleness, curiosity, and without expectation. Integration is what happens when you take what you learn from those bigger moments and from those moments where you're not sure if anything has even happened and start to to really live it. It's when you face a difficult conversation and you remember you can stay ented just by slowing your breath is when you catch yourself rushing or overthinking and you pause. Perhaps a hand on heart or perhaps just this knowing you can remind yourself, yeah, I'm here, and it's when you notice that you can take a moment for yourself and it all feels too much and return with more calm and clarity, feeling much more like you. It's something my clients often describe as this quiet hum of satisfaction, that knowing that they don't need to shout to be heard. And they can just stay rooted in who they are, even when life is, uh, very lifey. And honestly, that's what I want for all of us. That's why I'm sharing this with you now. So breathwork really is a way of living, not just something on the to-do list, not just something we can do on a retreat day or a workshop, although those things are lovely. So these days, breath work just isn't something that I do. It is something I truly live. It's part of how I train, how I coach, how I show up in relationships. It's the bridge between strength and softness, and the breath reminds me that I don't need to push my body into submission to force my way through change. I don't have to tear off chunks or pieces of myself or let go of whatever it's, I'm carrying. I'm whole, everything that's with me is supposed to be there so I can listen. I can adjust, and I can trust that everything begins and ends with that simple inhale and exhale. Because breath work at its heart. It's not about escaping life, it's about learning how to meet it fully. So maybe this week. You could give yourself permission to come back to your breath, not with the aim to fix anything. Let's just see what happens when you take time to notice, when you feel the air entering your lungs and noticing that rise and fall in your chest. That quiet reminder that you are here. You were alive. You are already enough. And if you are curious about exploring this more deeply about how breath work can support you in this season of midlife perimenopause, or change, then I'd love to connect. You can book a free clarity call at Carly Kill. Dot com, or you can join for one of my sessions at Still Space Hall, my breathwork studio, where we breathe, rest and reconnect together. So that's it for this week, and thank you as always for being here, for breathing with me and for welcoming this journey of presence together. Until next time, May you meet yourself with compassion. Walk with presents and remember, you already carry everything you need.